I'm on vacation, and I'm having a wonderful time. It's a paradise. Beautiful room, white sand beach, gorgeous view. 

And yet, I find myself having a difficult time relaxing entirely. I'm relaxing, but not completely relaxed. I find that I am suffering from a case of the "Shoulds".

Here are a list of my "Shoulds":

- I really need to take advantage of my time here!

- I should make a drawing or painting everyday.

- I should keep posting and staying engaged on social media.

- I should NOT post, and disengage completely.

- I should go I to a deep state of contemplation so I can start developing concepts and imagery for my next body of work.

- I should start collecting words and images for my next body of work.

- I should do paintings of the coastline so I can include coastal scenes in my next body of work.

- Furthermore, I should barely eat anything, so I will still feel okay in my bathing suit.

- I should drink less/more.

- I should swim in the ocean. 

- I should go for a hike/sample authentic local cuisine/learn to paddleboard...

Get the idea? So much to ponder and worry about.

I heard a while back that the word "should" can be very toxic. It is a good exercise to replace it with the word "want" and see what happens.

Actually, I have done a number of my "Shoulds", because they seemed like fun at the time.

But what have I done mostly? 

Mostly, I have gone on a deep dive into some really nerdy books on archeology. 

Yes, archeology is my way to relax. 

- I have two magazine subscriptions (World Archeology and The American Institute of Archeology Magazine).

- I am a fan of Patrick Wyman's podcast, Tides of History

- I watch archeology themed shows on TV and YouTube incessantly. (My favorite, which is not exactly about archeology, is Mysteries of the Abandoned on Discovery) 

So I'm on a geek-fest, learning about how the Proto-Indo-European language, a theoretical language that became extinct around 2500 BCE, was the root from which most of the languages spoken in the world today evolved from. 

What can I say? It's what I want to do.

A bibliography of my vacation:

Three Stones Make a Wall, by Eric H. Cline

The Horse, the Wheel, and Language, by David W. Anthony

Tales of Valhalla, by Martin and Hannah Whittock 

Beowulf, translation by Seamus Heaney

The Dig, by John Preston

It came from Out of the Past-  from 1947, to be exact. This scene from the famous film noir inspired images in my head that I couldn't shake.

 

 

So, in April 2021, I took a video of myself in costume walking down the stairs. Then I created a large drawing from that video. From that I developed a painting... But, like many worthwhile endeavors in life, there were twists, turns, and backtracks along the way.

I love working off of colored, textured grounds. So, in early May, I got off to an interesting start by using purple watercolor and allowing it to drip down the panel.

I sized the image of the drawing in photoshop, printed it out on sheets of paper, and transferred a light image of it onto a panel. Then, using the drawing and the photographs as a reference, I started the painting.

It became clear that something was missing. Something needed to be in the upper left of the composition... I searched about on line and found this awesome exit sign. (Here the name of the painting came into being.)

 

I also "closed up" the space, by making sure all walls, stairs and shadows were touching each other, enclosing the figure in with no way to "escape".

Break time.

This all happened from early May to late June. I set Exit aside. I worked on other projects, such as The Hanged Man and Watch.  

There may have been a beach trip or two as well...

 

 

All the while, I kept looking at Exit out of the corner of my eye... June ended... July ran its course... 

I kept thinking... this could be better. 

It's flat.

It doesn't have the glossy dark depth I had envisioned...

It needs...       blue.

Here I am, paintbrush in mouth, glazing a layer of Prussian blue over my painting. 

I also repainted the exit sign and made it larger. 

I changed her shoes from black to white. 

I even painted over the precious wood grain stairs I had worked so hard on.

But what about my awesome exit sign? Would I have to change the title of my painting?

With a tiny scrap of red paper and a bit of tape, I was able to see where to put my lovely vintage exit sign.

As I write this, the exit sign has been redone for a FORTH time- ⁠
⁠
Will this be my final move? Is the saga of Exit over once and for all???⁠ 

Finally, finally, I believe it is done. It started in May, and ran off and on until September.

©lesliepetersonsapp Exit

We live in a world of expediency, instant gratification and digital wizardry. But along the way, there has been a growing appreciation of the slow. For example, slow foods, artisanal cheese, vintage wine, and hand-made crafts are all important social and financial movements. 

By sharing the process of my art, I hope to celebrate the slow and deliberate. Just like life, many artistic pursuits take a long and winding road. Part of what makes art, art, is that the artist takes the time to follow that road wherever it leads.

This little book was a staple in my house, as it was in many peoples’ houses. It was a book that was used to gently, or not so gently tease me when I was small. 

 I was a very poky little puppy. 

It was an affectionate and perhaps slightly desperate attempt to get me to look up, to focus, to walk faster, and stop dawdling! The rest of my family seemed to be endlessly charging ahead, onto the next, and the next, and the next activity. 

Later in life, about 40 years of age, I was diagnosed with Attention Deficit Disorder, Inattentive Type. Much of my middle age has been spent trying to manage my errant mind with new found understanding, and to making up for time lost drifting through my almost rudderless young adulthood. 

Frustrating, yes, but ADD is closely associated with having a creative mind. No one really knows why. I think it is because all that wandering brings one to unexpected shores and vistas. I heard it once described this way; if one doesn’t think linearly, (marching forward along a path), then one tends to think laterally, that is, back and forth and side to side. 

A curious feature in many folks with ADD is called “hyper-focus”. This is when my normally wandering mind suddenly gets into gear, and I become completely engrossed in one activity for long periods of time. This is what happens when I make art. 

I will go back into the painting, and it will transform, like a make-over or a mid-life crisis. It will deepen and mature. Having that time to let it hibernate and incubate will often make a good piece into a great one. 

So it goes to show that life isn’t always about the next thing, and the next, and the next. Sometimes we need to stop and smell the strawberries. 

One such slow transformation unspooled during the creation of Exit, one of my latest pieces of art. You can read about the creation of this painting here, in The Saga of Exit.

This past month I had a particularly enlightening trip down memory lane, inspired by the sale of a favorite piece from a previous series.

Athena Stays the Dawn ©lesliepetersonsapp

Athena Stays the Dawn was done for a small series based on The Odyssey. It was done for a specific show, and after it was done I decided to go back to my work with film noir. But I have been inspired by classical literature and mythology throughout my artistic career.

When in college I did a series of art based on Shakespeare’s Richard III- I was so enamored with Sir Laurence Olivier’s movie I decided to create paintings with the characters in different contexts and times. 

Richard III College work by Leslie Peterson Sapp

 

When in my 30’s, I created work based on mythology from ancient Greece and pagan Europe.

The Green Man ©lesliepetersonsapp

Offering ©lesliepetersonsapp

I love and enjoy observational painting, but I seem compelled to tell a story with my art, to create a narrative. I am driven to explore and share the landscape of my imagination. The sale of Athena Stays the Dawn brought back memories of all the ways I have used art to tell stories. It seems that the act of telling a story is more important than the trappings of time and place and specific characters. 

It has been said that film noir are modern day myths.

Vacancy, hand painted intaglio

The characters have become archetypes in our collective imagination. Similar to the myths and stories of old, the characters are driven by forces larger than themselves and are so very, very human. Often being brought down by their own drives and weaknesses, they are driven by a futile effort to cheat Fate. The themes are an undying fact of what it is to be human. 

For now, I am entirely caught up in the dark labyrinth of film noir. But who knows what stories my future art will tell?

 

If you are interested in seeing my work based on The Odyssey, visit this page on my website.

If you want to read posts about it, here are some links to my blogposts about it.

My New Series Based on The Odyssey 

Why the Odyssey? 

The Land of the Lotus Eaters

Penelope, the Matchless Queen of Cunning

The Song of the Sirens!  

Athena, Telemachus and the Origin of the Word “Mentor”

⁠Georgia O'Keeffe is one of those rare artists who is a household name, whose work is instantly recognizable. She is known, of course, for her flower imagery, and her depictions of the American South West landscape. But she also did glorious, imaginative citiscapes.⁠

The Hotel Sheraton with Sunspots

New York Street with Moon

Radiator Building

⁠
In my newest piece, involving a man, reading a newspaper up against a building, I am thinking a lot about these images, and I lifted ideas directly from them, particularly this one here:

Georgia O'Keeffe, Ritz Tower, 1928

This piece, Watch, is still in process (though it seems to be close to being done). When I decided to add the lighted windows, I was taking a huge artistic risk and it changed the whole piece. It is The Ritz Tower by Georgia O'Keeffe that has been guiding me through.

Watch is 20x40, and has collaged newspaper, as well as collaged windows.

You can see the blow by blow process of making this painting on my Instagram, Facebook or, yes, even Twitter.

Watch, July 20, 2021

Watch, July 28, 2021

After doing mostly collage for a few years, I have taken a turn to painting again. Although I love the effect of the collage, painting provides me with agility and fluidity that I have come to miss. When I wish to alter or change a piece, a simple swipe of the brush and it is done.
With paint I am working hard on developing richness and depth, and expand upon the chiaroscuro effects so integral to the famous film noir aesthetic.  

©lesliepetersonsapp The Knave of Swords 30x20

The Knave of Swords started as a drawing, which I transferred onto a dark blue ground and went to work. He emerged fully formed, like Athena from Zeus' skull.⁠
⁠It is a wonderment to me that during this time of increased awareness of the plight of Asian Americans, and during Asian American and Pacific Islander Heritage Month that my latest male figure should arrive in the form of a sexy, bad-ass Asian man.⁠

©lesliepetersonsapp Queen of Diamonds 30x20

With this new beauty, I felt inspired to make a painting with a woman playing cards with us, the viewer, and at the same time doling out our fate. A real woman, and a quasi-super-natural element of fate at the same time. The question was, which suit should I make her? Which suit would pack the most amount of symbolic punch?

I solved it by creating an engaging online poll in my social media communities, asking my fans to vote on which suit, hearts or diamonds would best represent my newest femme fatale. The Queen of Hearts got a good showing, The Queen of Diamonds was the undisputed winner. 

To learn more about the unexpectedly complicated decision about which suit to choose, I have written an interesting blogpost about it, entitled When a Card Isn’t Just a Card:  A Lesson in a Lexicon of Racism

If you are interested in witnessing the blow-by-blow, non-stop action of what it takes to create an artpiece, you can follow me on social media: 

Instagram

Facebook

Even Twitter

In this short video, you can watch me paint the diamond on this card of Fate!

I am fascinated by playing cards and their symbolism. I recently felt inspired to make a painting with a woman playing cards with us, the viewer, and at the same time doling out our fate. A real woman, and a quasi-super-natural element of fate at the same time.

©lesliepetersonsapp Queen of Diamonds

But which card? Obviously, a Queen. Which suit? Which suit would pack the most amount of symbolic punch?
I started to research the four card suits and any symbolic meanings that might be associated with them. I was especially enjoying The Queen of Spades. In cartomancy she is supposed to represent a woman who is intelligent and strategic. She is also featured in a book by Pushkin and an opera by Tchaikovsky. Sometimes she is called The Black Madonna, Black Maria, or The Black Lady, and is considered a powerful, “unlucky” card. In Hearts and Old Maid, she has the power to end the game. There is a variant of Seven Card Stud Poker where she is featured called “The Bitch”. In Pinochle she and The Jack of Diamonds make a significant hand, boding doom for one’s opponent. I thought she would be the perfect candidate for this femme fatale, this goddess of chaos I was dreaming up. I was even considering making a companion piece called The Jack of Diamonds.

But my curiosity led me on an unexpected journey.

Way back in 1998 I saw the movie Bulworth. In it there is a scene where the main character, played by Warren Beatty, says to an audience full of African Americans “Let’s call a spade a spade” and the crowd erupted with indignation. Ever since then I have passively wondered about that and I thought now was the time to look up the phrase. 

It turns out it has evolved into a racial slur. 

The evolution of the phrase is fascinating. It used to mean “call it like it is”. It comes from an ancient Greek saying "to call a fig a fig and a trough a trough."  Which is in itself a sexual double entendre- get it? Figs? Troughs? (Never mind. It seems like everything back then was a sexual double entendre.) 

In an evolution that I only vaguely understand, the phrase was translated from Greek to Latin, from Latin to English. Note that during this time the term “spade” was still referring to gardens and gardening tools. 

During the Harlem Renaissance it started to be used by Black authors to refer to “Blackness” and also to playing cards. Terms like “Black as the ace of spades” started to be used (possibly an expression of “colorism” in the Black community). But then, like so many things, it got appropriated by white authors and evolved into a derogatory term. 

So, what about my new main character as The Queen of Spades? Well, it gets worse. The term “queen of spades” has evolved (or devolved) even further to refer to white women who fetishize Black men. I don’t mean date or marry or love a Black man, I mean sexually fetishize Black men, often in company with their white male partners. This is dual objectification; of the Black man, and of the white woman. It is a particularly ugly form of racism.

Out of my ignorance, I almost walked face first into a racially charged image. 

Imagine that. Imagine I had not seen Bulworth all those years ago, had not remembered the term, had not decided to search Wikipedia for the phrase, had not done an additional google search specifically about The Queen of Spades. I would have made a piece of art featuring a sexy, very white woman, (white because I was thinking about the white of the playing card and wanting the painting to have echoes of that) and called it The Queen of Spades. What is doubly alarming is that I had been musing about completing that Pinochle hand by painting The Jack of Diamonds, and arbitrarily creating him as a Black man. 

All completely unaware. 

I have gone through my life submerged in whiteness and white culture, to the extent to where there is a racial slur, I might not even know about it or see it for what it is. 

Some people might say that I am being overly precious, too “PC” or too “sensitive”. Furthermore, it might be said that many people don’t know about this particular racial slur, so why would it matter? But one of the values I hold is to be respectful of all people as much as possible. In order to do that, I need to learn about when I might be doing or saying something that is racist, because racism does harm. Period. It is important because even if I don’t intend to be racist, it doesn’t mean I haven’t caused racial harm. 

Not only that, my audience is wide and varied, and I want everyone who interacts with my art to be able to relate to it- or at least not feel disrespected or hurt. 

So, it was a simple matter of rethinking my metaphors. Away from the stormy waters of the suit of spades and toward the equally intriguing subjects of Love and Money. Love with The Queen of Hearts, and money with the heartless Queen of Diamonds. In fact, I turned it to my advantage by creating an engaging online poll in my social media communities, asking my fans to vote on which suit, hearts or diamonds would best represent my newest femme fatale. The Queen of Hearts got a good showing, The Queen of Diamonds was the undisputed winner. 

So, The Queen of Diamonds, she is.

To read a good article about the evolution of these terms, visitCode Switch from NPR
 

©lesliepetersonsapp Ambivalence

My Film Noir series has dark, rich colors, high drama, and often integrates collage for pop and panache.

But those of you who have followed my art for a while know that it wasn’t always that way. 

For many years I did work in a very different style, based on vintage snapshots of ordinary people. This body of work evokes feelings of wistful nostalgia. 

©lesliepetersonsapp You Are the Only One 24x36 Acrylic on panel

They are boldly drawn with thin layers of paint over visible wood grain. It was a popular and satisfying method that worked for me for years before I felt the need to evolve and change. 

©lesliepetersonsapp Reservoir 36x24 Acrylic on panel

Many of these pieces are still available! In this vein, I’ve done an entire reorganization of my website. I have included a page of available artworks in this previous style.
 
The website is organized into three pages under Portfolio. Each image on each page has a clear indication of where to inquire about the piece, and if you feel so moved, how to buy it.

visit www.lesliepetersonsapp.com to see all my work, current and otherwise!

Another way to explore this earlier style is to visit previous blogposts, especially the years 2013 and before.  Look at the Archive section on the right side of this page to investigate.

Through the month of August, I will be the featured artist at RiverSea Gallery in beautiful Astoria, OR.

Show dates: August 8th - September 8th
RiverSea Gallery 1160 Commercial St, Astoria, OR.

The opening night for Story Without a Plot was a wonderful success!
Thank you to all the people who attended my art opening at RiverSea Gallery last night, online or in person.
In association with the show we held an artist talk. Times being what they are, we did it online in a zoom call. This is an edited video of the artist talk. I talked about why I am inspired by film noir, discuss how I develop an image, then open the “room” up for questions.